**i posted this on my blog a few days ago, but i thought it was important to share on this platform, given the recent comments about feeling guilty for not maintaining the “strong black woman” role 24/7. i want every black girl to know that their anger, sadness, and pain are all valid.**
i was knee deep in a very heartfelt blog post about the numerous women of color on my campus who are single, when i got around to the idea of "racial preferences". i decided to look up the definition of "preference" and i got some profound insight in the true vileness that is "racial preference".
preference: noun the state of preferring
prefer: verb to set or hold before or above other people or things in estimation; like better; choose rather than
to have a racial preference is to actually hold one race above another. further, there is no actual evidence proving that that person of that particular race could do more or less for you as a romantic partner, but you just assume that a person of a specific race would be better suited for you.
the problem with this is, if you’re a person of color claiming that you only date people of non-color simply because of "racial preference", you’re actually claiming that you’d rather date a white person than a person of color because you assume that the white race (or any other race of non-color) is better.
what you use to assume or estimate that white is better is even more problematic: the default belief that white is always right and best, and anything else is inherently tainted and beneath or behind.
i think we could all use some time to reflect.
what’s stopping you from acting on the potential you see in a possible dating partner? color?
i don’t say all this to preach the “color-blind” nonsense, but to put dating in a different perspective.
you can’t separate people from their color because no doubt much of their person is directly shaped from color and identifies with their color. you can’t divorce the two without taking away the very person his/her/themselves.
but dating is simply taking a chance on and spending time with someone who you believe shares your interests, beliefs, and vision. color should never be the hindering factor.
please stop using the "racial preference" defense to justify your choice to shut out people of color . it’s just another hit to people of color wholly, women of color especially, and black women crucially
why is there even this whole idea that if you “just hand people things” all creativity will cease because nobody will have any motivation to work hard
everybody I’ve ever met has something they would do passionately and well if money wasn’t an issue
the need for money is the bane of creativity
Ferguson live streams I’ve been keeping track of:
And honestly helping people understand what is going on is hard because 1. we ourselves have to try and fully understand what is going on and 2. we have to continue to remind ourselves we are viewing this from an outside perspective and not receiving the most factual and unbiased information about everything that happened there from BOTH sides. Being that you are from outside the US you’d probably be surprised if I told you that the bullshit you’re seeing on the TV is the same bullshit we are seeing on our TVs about this case which is why a lot of us have taken to the internet to sort through what is fact and what is fiction. The best thing you can do is take to social media where a lot of community members who are in Ferguson are giving updates on what is going on along with pictures, videos, and their own feelings about the situation. After all this is THEIR community and a lot of people are making the mistake of judging what happened based on the outsider perspective of the media and making false assumptions about the victim and the citizens who live there.
Follow Antonio French on ALL of his social media. He is a St. Louis Alderman who has been in the trenches with the community providing information from day one. And keep using the critical eye that you have been using to question the information you are being presented by the media.
Thank you for the support, and my puppy is doing better today up being his rascal self!
Edit: And vine. Make sure you keep your eye out for vine.